Archives for category: funny quotes

Middle age is when your broad mind and narrow waist begin to change places.

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There are two ways to pass a hurdle: leaping over or plowing through… There needs to be a monster truck option!

We hate some persons because we do not know them; and we will never know them because we hate them.

Jealousy is all the fun you think they had.

Some people speak only when they have nothing to say.

Always be nice to your children, because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

The real hero is always a hero by mistake; he dreams of being an honest coward like everybody else.

Time is that quality of nature which keeps events from happening all at once. Lately it doesn’t seem to be working.

A gentleman is a man who can play the accordion but doesn’t

What can you expect from a day that begins with having to get up?